Marcia Schuyler (version 2) — Chapter 23
CHAPTER XXIII
Marcia had gone down to her own house the next morning very early.
She had hoped for a letter but none had come.
Her soul was in torment between her attempt to keep out of her mind the hateful things Hannah Heath had said, and reproaching herself for what seemed to her her unseemly feeling toward David, who loved another and could never love her.
It was not a part of her life-dream to love one who belonged to another.
Yet her heart was his and she was beginning to know that everything belonging to him was dear to her.
She went and sat in his place at the table, she touched with tenderness the books upon his desk that he had used before he went away, she went up to his room and laid her lips for one precious daring instant upon his pillow, and then drew back with wildly beating heart ashamed of her emotion.
She knelt beside his bed and prayed: “Oh, God, I love him, I love him!
I cannot help it!
” as if she would apologize for herself, and then she hugged the thought of her love to herself, feeling its sweet pain drift through her like some delicious agony.
Her love had come through sorrow to her, and was not as she would have had it could she have chosen.
It brought no ray of happy hope for the future, save just the happiness of loving in secret, and of doing for the object loved, with no thought of a returned affection.
Then she went slowly down the stairs, trying to think how it would seem when David came back.
He had been so long gone that it seemed as if perhaps he might never return.
She felt that it had been no part of the spirit of her contract with David that she should render to him this wild sweet love that he had expected Kate to give.
He had not wanted it.
He had only wanted a wife in name.
Then the color would sweep over her face in a crimson drift and leave it painfully white, and she would glide to the piano like a ghost of her former self and play some sad sweet strain, and sometimes sing.
She had no heart for her dear old woods in these days.
She had tried it one day in spring; slipped over the back fence and away through the ploughed field where the sea of silver oats had surged, and up to the hillside and the woods; but she was so reminded of David that it only brought heart aches and tears.
She wondered if it was because she was getting old that the hillside did not seem so joyous now, and she did not care to look up into the sky just for the pure joy of sky and air and clouds, nor to listen to the branches whisper to the robins nesting.
She stooped and picked a great handful of spring beauties, but they did not seem to give her pleasure, and by and by she dropped them from listless fingers and walked sedately down to the house once more.
On this morning she did not even care to play.
She went into the parlor and touched a few notes, but her heart was heavy and sad.
Life was growing too complex.
Last week there had come a letter from Harry Temple.
It had startled her when it arrived.
She feared it was some ill-news about David, coming as it did from New York and being written in a strange hand.
It had been a plea for forgiveness, representing that the writer had experienced nothing but deep repentance and sorrow since the time he had seen her last.
He set forth his case in a masterly way, with little touching facts of his childhood, and lonely upbringing, with no mother to guide.
He told her that her noble action toward him had but made him revere her the more, and that, in short, she had made a new creature of him by refusing to return his kiss that day, and leaving him alone with so severe a rebuke.
He felt that if all women were so good and true men would be a different race, and now he looked up to her as one might look up to an angel, and he felt he could never be happy again on this earth until he had her written word of forgiveness.
With that he felt he could live a new life, and she must rest assured that he would never offer other than reverence to any woman again.
He further added that his action had not intended any insult to her, that he was merely expressing his natural admiration for a spirit so good and true, and that his soul was innocent of any intention of evil.
With sophistry in the use of which he was an adept, he closed his epistle, fully clearing himself, and assuring her that he could have made her understand it that day if she had not left so suddenly, and he had not been almost immediately called away to the dying bed of his dear cousin.
This contradictory letter had troubled Marcia greatly.
She was keen enough to see that his logic was at fault, and that the two pages of his letter did not hang together, but one thing was plain, that he wished her forgiveness.
The Bible said that one must forgive, and surely it was right to let him know that she did, though when she thought of the fright he had given her it was hard to do.
Still, it was right, and if he was so unhappy, perhaps she had better let him know.
She would rather have waited until David returned to consult him in the matter, but the letter seemed so insistent that she had finally written a stiff little note, in formal language, “Mrs. Spafford sends herewith her full and free forgiveness to Mr. Harry Temple, and promises to think no more of the matter.
” She would have liked to consult some one.
She almost thought of taking Aunt Clarinda into her confidence, but decided that she might not understand.
So she finally sent off the brief missive, and let her troubled thoughts wander after it more than once.
She was standing by the window looking out into the yard perplexing herself over this again when there came a loud knocking at the front door.
She started, half frightened, for the knock sounded through the empty house so insistently.
It seemed like trouble coming.
She felt nervous as she went down the hall.
It was only a little urchin, barefoot, and tow-headed.
He had ridden an old mare to the door, and left her nosing at the dusty grass.
He brought her a letter.
Again her heart fluttered excitedly.
Who could be writing to her?
It was not David.
Why did the handwriting look familiar?
It could not be from any one at home.
Father?
Mother?
No, it was no one she knew.
She tore it open, and the boy jumped on his horse and was off down the street before she realized that he was gone.
“DEAR MADAM:” the letter read, “I bring you news of your husband, and having met with an accident I am unable to come further.
You will find me at the Green Tavern two miles out on the corduroy road.
As the business is private, please come alone.
“A MESSENGER.
” Marcia trembled so that she sat down on the stairs.
A sudden weakness went over her like a wave, and the hall grew dark around her as though she were going to faint.
But she did not.
She was strong and well and had never fainted in her life.
She rallied in a moment and tried to think.
Something had happened to David.
Something dreadful, perhaps, and she must go at once and find out.
Still it must be something mysterious, for the man had said it was private.
Of course that meant David would not want it known.
David had intended that the man would come to her and tell her by herself.
She must go.
There was nothing else to be done.
She must go at once and get rid of this awful suspense.
It was a good day for the message to have come, for she had brought her lunch expecting to do some spring cleaning.
David had been expected home soon, and she liked to make a bustle of preparation as if he might come in any day, for it kept up her good cheer.
Having resolved to go she got up at once, closed the doors and windows, put on her bonnet and went out down the street toward the old corduroy road.
It frightened her to think what might be at the end of her journey.
Possibly David himself, hurt or dying, and he had sent for her in this way that she might break the news gently to his aunts.
As she walked along she conjured various forms of trouble that might have come to him.
Now and then she would try to take a cheerful view, saying to herself that David might have needed more important papers, papers which he would not like everyone to know about, and had sent by special messenger to her to get them.
Then her face would brighten and her step grow more brisk.
But always would come the dull thud of possibility of something more serious.
Her heart beat so fast sometimes that she was forced to lessen her speed to get her breath, for though she was going through town, and must necessarily walk somewhat soberly lest she call attention to herself, she found that her nerves and imagination were fairly running ahead, and waiting impatiently for her feet to catch up at every turning place.
At last she came to the corduroy road—a long stretch of winding way overlaid with logs which made an unpleasant path.
Most of the way was swampy, and bordered in some places by thick, dark woods.
Marcia sped on from log to log, with a nervous feeling that she must step on each one or her errand would not be successful.
She was not afraid of the loneliness, only of what might be coming at the end of her journey.
But suddenly, in the densest part of the wood, she became conscious of footsteps echoing hers, and a chill laid hold upon her.
She turned her head and there, wildly gesticulating and running after her, was Miranda!
Annoyed, and impatient to be on her way, and wondering what to do with Miranda, or what she could possibly want, Marcia stopped to wait for her.
“I thought—as you was goin’ ’long my way”—puffed Miranda, “I’d jes’ step along beside you.
You don’t mind, do you?
” Marcia looked troubled.
If she should say she did then Miranda would think it queer and perhaps suspect something.
She tried to smile and ask how far Miranda was going.
“Oh, I’m goin’ to hunt fer wild strawberries,” said the girl nonchalantly clattering a big tin pail.
“Isn’t it early yet for strawberries?
” questioned Marcia.
“Well, mebbe, an’ then ag’in mebbe ’tain’t. I know a place I’m goin’ to look anyway.
Are you goin’ ’s fur ’s the Green Tavern?
” Miranda’s bright eyes looked her through and through, and Marcia’s truthful ones could not evade.
Suddenly as she looked into the girl’s homely face, filled with a kind of blind adoration, her heart yearned for counsel in this trying situation.
She was reminded of Miranda’s helpfulness the time she ran away to the woods, and the care with which she had guarded the whole matter so that no one ever heard of it.
An impulse came to her to confide in Miranda.
She was a girl of sharp common sense, and would perhaps be able to help with her advice.
At least she could get comfort from merely telling her trouble and anxiety.
“Miranda,” she said, “can you keep a secret?
” The girl nodded.
“Well, I’m going to tell you something, just because I am so troubled and I feel as if it would do me good to tell it.
” She smiled and Miranda answered the smile with much satisfaction and no surprise.
Miranda had come for this, though she did not expect her way to be so easy.
“I’ll be mum as an oyster,” said Miranda.
“You jest tell me anything you please.
You needn’t be afraid Hannah Heath’ll know a grain about it.
She’n’ I are two people.
I know when to shut up.
” “Well, Miranda, I’m in great perplexity and anxiety.
I’ve just had a note from a messenger my husband has sent asking me to come out to that Green Tavern you were talking about.
He was sent to me with some message and has had an accident so he couldn’t come.
It kind of frightened me to think what might be the matter.
I’m glad you are going this way because it keeps me from thinking about it.
Are we nearly there?
I never went out this road so far before.
” “It ain’t fur,” said Miranda as if that were a minor matter.
“I’ll go right along in with you, then you needn’t feel lonely.
I guess likely it’s business.
Don’t you worry.
” The tone was reassuring, but Marcia’s face looked troubled.
“No, I guess that won’t do, Miranda, for the note says it is a private matter and I must come alone.
You know Mr. Spafford has matters to write about that are very important, railroads, and such things, and sometimes he doesn’t care to have any one get hold of his ideas before they appear in the paper.
His enemies might use them to stop the plans of the great improvements he is writing about.
” “Let me see that note!
” demanded Miranda.
“Got it with you?
” Marcia hesitated.
Perhaps she ought not to show it, and yet there was nothing in the note but what she had already told the girl, and she felt sure she would not breathe a word to a living soul after her promise.
She handed Miranda the letter, and they stopped a moment while she slowly spelled it out.
Miranda was no scholar.
Marcia watched her face eagerly, as if to gather a ray of hope from it, but she was puzzled by Miranda’s look.
A
kind of satisfaction had overspread her homely countenance.
“Should you think from that that David was hurt—or ill—or—or—killed—or anything?
” She asked the question as if Miranda were a wizard, and hung anxiously upon her answer.
“Naw, I don’t reckon so!
” said Miranda.
“Don’t you worry.
David’s all right somehow.
I’ll take care o’ you.
You go ’long up and see what’s the business, an’ I’ll wait here out o’ sight o’ the tavern.
Likely’s not he might take a notion not to tell you ef he see me come along with you.
You jest go ahead, and I’ll be on hand when you get through.
If you need me fer anything you jest holler out ‘Randy!
’ good and loud an’ I’ll hear you.
Guess I’ll set on this log.
The tavern’s jest round that bend in the road.
Naw, you needn’t thank me.
This is a real pretty mornin’ to set an’ rest.
Good-bye.
” Marcia hurried on, glancing back happily at her protector in a calico sunbonnet seated stolidly on a log with her tin pail beside her.
Poor stupid Miranda!
Of course she could not understand what a comfort it was to have confided her trouble.
Marcia went up to the tavern with almost a smile on her face, though her heart began to beat wildly as a slatternly girl led her into a big room at the right of the hall.
As Marcia disappeared behind the bend in the road, Miranda stealthily stole along the edge of the woods, till she stood hidden behind a clump of alders where she could peer out and watch Marcia until she reached the tavern and passed safely by the row of lounging, smoking men, and on into the doorway.
Then Miranda waited just an instant to look in all directions, and sped across the road, mounting the fence and on through two meadows, and the barnyard to the kitchen door of the tavern.
“Mornin’!
Mis’ Green,” she said to the slovenly looking woman who sat by the table peeling potatoes.
“Mind givin’ me a drink o’ water?
I’m terrible thirsty, and seemed like I couldn’t find the spring.
Didn’t thare used to be a spring ’tween here’n town?
” “Goodness sakes!
Randy!
Where’d you come from?
Water!
Jes’ help yourself.
There’s the bucket jes’ from the spring five minutes since, an’ there’s the gourd hanging up on the wall.
I can’t get up, I’m that busy.
Twelve to dinner to-day, an’ only me to do the cookin’.
’Melia she’s got to be upstairs helpin’ at the bar.
” “Who all you got here?
” questioned Miranda as she took a draught from the old gourd.
“Well, got a gentleman from New York fur one.
He’s real pretty.
Quite a beau.
His clo’es are that nice you’d think he was goin’ to court.
He’s that particular ’bout his eatin’ I feel flustered.
Nothin’ would do but he hed to hev a downstairs room.
He said he didn’t like goin’ upstairs.
He don’t look sickly, neither.
” “Mebbe he’s had a accident an’ lamed himself,” suggested Miranda cunningly.
“Heard o’ any accidents?
How’d he come?
Coach or horseback?
” “Coach,” said Mrs. Green.
“Why do you ask?
Got any friends in New York?
” “Not many,” responded Miranda importantly, “but my cousin Hannah Heath has.
You know she’s ben up there for a spell visitin’ an’ they say there was lots of gentlemen in love with her.
There’s one in particular used to come round a good deal.
It might be him come round to see ef it’s true Hannah’s goin’ to get married to Lem Skinner.
Know what this fellow’s name is?
” “You don’t say!
Well now it might be.
No, I don’t rightly remember his name.
Seems though it was something like Church er Chapel.
’Melia could tell ye, but she’s busy.
” “Where’s he at?
Mebbe I could get a glimpse o’ him.
I’d jest like to know ef he was comin’ to bother our Hannah.
” “Well now.
Mebbe you could get a sight o’ him.
There’s a cupboard between his room an’ the room back.
It has a door both sides.
Mebbe ef you was to slip in there you might see him through the latch hole.
I ain’t usin’ that back room fer anythin’ but a store-room this spring, so look out you don’t stumble over nothin’ when you go in fer it’s dark as a pocket.
You go right ’long in.
I reckon you’ll find the way.
Yes, it’s on the right hand side o’ the hall.
I’ve got to set here an’ finish these potatoes er dinner’ll be late.
I’d like to know real well ef he’s one o’ Hannah Heath’s beaux.
” Miranda needed no second bidding.
She slipped through the hall and store room, and in a moment stood before the door of the closet.
Softly she opened it, and stepped in, lifting her feet cautiously, for the closet floor seemed full of old boots and shoes.
It was dark in there, very dark, and only one slat of light stabbed the blackness coming through the irregular shape of the latch hole.
She could hear voices in low tones speaking on the other side of the door.
Gradually her eyes grew accustomed to the light and one by one objects came out of the shadows and looked at her.
A white pitcher with a broken nose, a row of bottles, a bunch of seed corn with the husks braided together and hung on a nail, an old coat on another nail.
Down on her knees beside the crack of light went Miranda.
First her eye and then her ear were applied to the small aperture.
She could see nothing but a table directly in front of the door about a foot away on which were quills, paper, and a large horn inkstand filled with ink.
Some one evidently had been writing, for a page was half done, and the pen was laid down beside a word.
The limits of the latch hole made it impossible for Miranda to make out any more.
She applied her ear and could hear a man’s voice talking in low insinuating tones, but she could make little of what was said.
It drove her fairly frantic to think that she was losing time.
Miranda had no mind to be balked in her purpose.
She meant to find out who was in that room and what was going on.
She felt a righteous interest in it.
Her eyes could see quite plainly now in the dark closet.
There was a big button on the door.
She no sooner discovered it than she put up her hand and tried to turn it.
It was tight and made a slight squeak in turning.
She stopped but the noise seemed to have no effect upon the evenly modulated tones inside.
Cautiously she moved the button again, holding the latch firmly in her other hand lest the door should suddenly fly open.
It was an exciting moment when at last the button was turned entirely away from the door frame and the lifted latch swung free in Miranda’s hand.
The door opened outward.
If it were allowed to go it would probably strike against the table.
Miranda only allowed it to open a crack.
She could hear words now, and the voice reminded her of something unpleasant.
The least little bit more she dared open the door, and she could see, as she had expected, Marcia’s bonnet and shoulder cape as she sat at the other side of the room.
This then was the room of the messenger who had sent for Mrs. Spafford so peremptorily.
The next thing was to discover the identity of the messenger.
Miranda had suspicions.
The night before she had seen a man lurking near the Spafford house when she went out in the garden to feed the chickens.
She had watched him from behind the lilac bush, and when he had finally gone away she had followed him some distance until he turned into the old corduroy road and was lost in the gathering dusk.
The man she had seen before, and had reason to suspect.
It was not for nothing that she had braved her grandmother and gone hunting wild strawberries out of season.
With the caution of a creature of the forest Miranda opened the door an inch further, and applied her eye to the latch hole again.
The man’s head was in full range of her eye then, and her suspicion proved true.
When Marcia entered the big room and the heavy oak door closed behind her her heart seemed almost choking her, but she tried with all her might to be calm.
She was to know the worst now.
On the other side of the room in a large arm-chair, with his feet extended on another and covered by a travelling shawl, reclined a man.
Marcia went toward him eagerly, and then stopped: “Mr. Temple!
” There was horror, fear, reproach in the way she spoke it.
“I know you are astonished, Mrs. Spafford, that the messenger should be one so unworthy, and let me say at the beginning that I am more thankful than I can express that your letter of forgiveness reached me before I was obliged to start on my sorrowful commission.
I beg you will sit down and be as comfortable as you can while I explain further.
Pardon my not rising.
I have met with a bad sprain caused by falling from my horse on the way, and was barely able to reach this stopping place.
My ankle is swollen so badly that I cannot step upon my foot.
” Marcia, with white face, moved to the chair he indicated near him, and sat down.
The one thought his speech had conveyed to her had come through those words “my sorrowful commission.
” She felt the need of sitting down, for her limbs would no longer bear her up, and she felt she must immediately know what was the matter.
“Mrs. Spafford, may I ask you once more to speak your forgiveness?
Before I begin to tell you what I have come for, I long to hear you say the words ‘I forgive you.
’ Will you give me your hand and say them?
” “Mr. Temple, I beg you will tell me what is the matter.
Do not think any further about that other matter.
I meant what I said in the note.
Tell me quick!
Is my husband—has anything happened to Mr. Spafford?
Is he ill?
Is he hurt?
” “My poor child!
How can I bear to tell you?
It seems terrible to put your love and trust upon another human being and then suddenly find—— But wait.
Let me tell the story in my own way.
No, your husband is not hurt, physically.
Illness, and death even, are not the worst things that can happen to a mortal soul.
It seems to me cruel, as I see you sit there so young and tender and beautiful, that I should have to hurt you by what I have to say.
I come from the purest of motives to tell you a sad truth about one who should be nearest and dearest to you of all the earth.
I beg you will look upon me kindly and believe that it hurts me to have to tell you these things.
Before I begin I pray you will tell me that you forgive me for all I have to say.
Put your hand in mine and say so.
” Marcia had listened to this torrent of words unable to stop them, a choking sensation in her throat, fear gripping her heart.
Some terrible thing had happened.
Her senses refused to name the possibility.
Would he never tell?
What ailed the man that he wanted her hand in forgiveness?
Of course she forgave him.
