Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2, No. 22, July, 1921 — Arthur Neale’s Page, and Our Monthly Prayer
Debt is a trap which a man sets and baits for him self and then deliberately falls into.
_Arthur Neale’s Page_ I wish to assure the readers of Captain William’s Whiz Bang that what we stand for is one country, one flag, one language and one-piece bathing suits.
* * * * * _’Cause what looks so cute_ _As a nice bathing suit—_ _Provided inside it_ _The girl is a beaut?
_ * * * * * We notice the Very Rev. “Golightly” Morrill says: “At Puerto Cabello one goes in swimming au natural.
The guide-book says: ‘The natural beauties of the place are charming.
’” That settles it!
Puerto Cabello is where we spend the vacation!
* * * * * _We heard someone say: “I do admire Art”;_ _We blushed as we thought of our striving,_ _But the next thing they said was a stab to the heart.
_ _’Twas: “Look!
She’s so graceful when diving.
”_ * * * * * Every year the bathing regulations grow stricter.
If Gus, the hired man, read the ones for Coney Island this year we think he’d say they wear more in the sea than they do on the sidewalk.
* * * * * _Miss Venus, as perhaps you know,_ _Had lost her pair of arms;_ _It didn’t matter to her beau,_ _The gal had other charms.
_ * * * * * As the refined woman single in vaudeville said: “I may be no riot—but thank God, I’m satisfied.
” * * * * * Our friends in the song-writing game will be interested to learn that we are now at work on a snappy little one-step entitled: “When Adam Said ‘Eve, You’re a Naughty Little Girl.
’ She said: ‘Well, I don’t care A dam.
’” * * * * * Our Monthly Prayer “O Fadder, give thy servant this mornin’ de eye of de eagle and de wisdom of de owl; connect his soul with de gospel telephone in de central skies;
’luminate his brow with de sun of heaben; pizen his mind with love for de people; turpentine his ’magination; grease his lips with ’possum oil;
power; ’lectrify his brain with de lightnin’ of de loosen his tongue with de sledge hammer of thy word; put ’petual motion in his ahms; fill him plum’ full of de dynamite of thy glory; ’noint him all over with de kerosene oil of thy salvation, and sot him on the fire.
Amen!
”
