Ambassadors — 36 - Book Twelfth, Chapter 5
V
He had, however, within two days, another separation to face.
He had sent Maria Gostrey a word early, by hand, to ask if he might come to breakfast; in consequence of which, at noon, she awaited him in the cool shade of her little Dutch-looking dining-room.
This retreat was at the back of the house, with a view of a scrap of old garden that had been saved from modern ravage; and though he had on more than one other occasion had his legs under its small and peculiarly polished table of hospitality, the place had never before struck him as so sacred to pleasant knowledge, to intimate charm, to antique order, to a neatness that was almost august.
To sit there was, as he had told his hostess before, to see life reflected for the time in ideally kept pewter;
which was somehow becoming, improving to life, so that one’s eyes were held and comforted.
Strether’s were comforted at all events now—and the more that it was the last time—with the charming effect, on the board bare of a cloth and proud of its perfect surface, of the small old crockery and old silver, matched by the more substantial pieces happily disposed about the room.
The specimens of vivid Delf, in particular had the dignity of family portraits; and it was in the midst of them that our friend resignedly expressed himself.
He spoke even with a certain philosophic humour.
“There’s nothing more to wait for; I seem to have done a good day’s work.
I’ve let them have it all round.
I’ve seen Chad, who has been to London and come back.
He tells me I’m ‘exciting,’ and I seem indeed pretty well to have upset every one.
I’ve at any rate excited _him_.
He’s distinctly restless.
” “You’ve excited _me_,” Miss Gostrey smiled.
“_I’m_ distinctly restless.
” “Oh you were that when I found you.
It seems to me I’ve rather got you out of it.
What’s this,” he asked as he looked about him, “but a haunt of ancient peace?
” “I wish with all my heart,” she presently replied, “I could make you treat it as a haven of rest.
” On which they fronted each other, across the table, as if things unuttered were in the air.
Strether seemed, in his way, when he next spoke, to take some of them up.
“It wouldn’t give me—that would be the trouble—what it will, no doubt, still give you.
I’m not,” he explained, leaning back in his chair, but with his eyes on a small ripe round melon—“in real harmony with what surrounds me.
You _are_.
I take it too hard.
You _don’t_.
It makes—that’s what it comes to in the end—a fool of me.
” Then at a tangent, “What has he been doing in London?
” he demanded.
“Ah one may go to London,” Maria laughed.
“You know _I_ did.
” Yes—he took the reminder.
“And you brought _me_ back.
” He brooded there opposite to her, but without gloom.
“Whom has Chad brought?
He’s full of ideas.
And I wrote to Sarah,” he added, “the first thing this morning.
So I’m square.
I’m ready for them.
” She neglected certain parts of this speech in the interest of others.
“Marie said to me the other day that she felt him to have the makings of an immense man of business.
” “There it is.
He’s the son of his father!
” “But _such_ a father!
” “Ah just the right one from that point of view!
But it isn’t his father in him,” Strether added, “that troubles me.
” “What is it then?
” He came back to his breakfast; he partook presently of the charming melon, which she liberally cut for him; and it was only after this that he met her question.
Then moreover it was but to remark that he’d answer her presently.
She waited, she watched, she served him and amused him, and it was perhaps with this last idea that she soon reminded him of his having never even yet named to her the article produced at Woollett.
“Do you remember our talking of it in London—that night at the play?
” Before he could say yes, however, she had put it to him for other matters.
Did he remember, did he remember—this and that of their first days?
He remembered everything, bringing up with humour even things of which she professed no recollection, things she vehemently denied; and falling back above all on the great interest of their early time, the curiosity felt by both of them as to where he would “come out.
” They had so assumed it was to be in some wonderful place—they had thought of it as so very _much_ out.
Well, that was doubtless what it had been—since he had come out just there.
He was out, in truth, as far as it was possible to be, and must now rather bethink himself of getting in again.
He found on the spot the image of his recent history; he was like one of the figures of the old clock at Berne.
_They_ came out, on one side, at their hour, jigged along their little course in the public eye, and went in on the other side.
He too had jigged his little course—him too a modest retreat awaited.
He offered now, should she really like to know, to name the great product of Woollett.
It would be a great commentary on everything.
At this she stopped him off; she not only had no wish to know, but she wouldn’t know for the world.
She had done with the products of Woollett—for all the good she had got from them.
She desired no further news of them, and she mentioned that Madame de Vionnet herself had, to her knowledge, lived exempt from the information he was ready to supply.
She had never consented to receive it, though she would have taken it, under stress, from Mrs. Pocock.
But it was a matter about which Mrs. Pocock appeared to have had little to say—never sounding the word—and it didn’t signify now.
There was nothing clearly for Maria Gostrey that signified now—save one sharp point, that is, to which she came in time.
“I don’t know whether it’s before you as a possibility that, left to himself, Mr. Chad may after all go back.
I judge that it _is_ more or less so before you, from what you just now said of him.
” Her guest had his eyes on her, kindly but attentively, as if foreseeing what was to follow this.
“I don’t think it will be for the money.
” And then as she seemed uncertain: “I mean I don’t believe it will be for that he’ll give her up.
” “Then he _will_ give her up?
” Strether waited a moment, rather slow and deliberate now, drawing out a little this last soft stage, pleading with her in various suggestive and unspoken ways for patience and understanding.
“What were you just about to ask me?
” “Is there anything he can do that would make you patch it up?
” “With Mrs. Newsome?
” Her assent, as if she had had a delicacy about sounding the name, was only in her face; but she added with it: “Or is there anything he can do that would make _her_ try it?
” “To patch it up with me?
” His answer came at last in a conclusive headshake.
“There’s nothing any one can do.
It’s over.
Over for both of us.
” Maria wondered, seemed a little to doubt.
“Are you so sure for her?
” “Oh yes—sure now.
Too much has happened.
I’m different for her.
” She took it in then, drawing a deeper breath.
“I see.
So that as she’s different for _you_—” “Ah but,” he interrupted, “she’s not.
” And as Miss Gostrey wondered again: “She’s the same.
She’s more than ever the same.
But I do what I didn’t before—I _see_ her.
” He spoke gravely and as if responsibly—since he had to pronounce; and the effect of it was slightly solemn, so that she simply exclaimed “Oh!
” Satisfied and grateful, however, she showed in her own next words an acceptance of his statement.
“What then do you go home to?
” He had pushed his plate a little away, occupied with another side of the matter; taking refuge verily in that side and feeling so moved that he soon found himself on his feet.
He was affected in advance by what he believed might come from her, and he would have liked to forestall it and deal with it tenderly; yet in the presence of it he wished still more to be—though as smoothly as possible—deterrent and conclusive.
He put her question by for the moment; he told her more about Chad.
“It would have been impossible to meet me more than he did last night on the question of the infamy of not sticking to her.
” “Is that what you called it for him—‘infamy’?
” “Oh rather!
I described to him in detail the base creature he’d be, and he quite agrees with me about it.
” “So that it’s really as if you had nailed him?
” “Quite really as if—!
I told him I should curse him.
” “Oh,” she smiled, “you _have_ done it.
” And then having thought again: “You _can’t_ after that propose—!
” Yet she scanned his face.
“Propose again to Mrs. Newsome?
” She hesitated afresh, but she brought it out.
“I’ve never believed, you know, that you did propose.
I always believed it was really she—and, so far as that goes, I can understand it.
What I mean is,” she explained, “that with such a spirit—the spirit of curses!
—your breach is past mending.
She has only to know what you’ve done to him never again to raise a finger.
” “I’ve done,” said Strether, “what I could—one can’t do more.
He protests his devotion and his horror.
But I’m not sure I’ve saved him.
He protests too much.
He asks how one can dream of his being tired.
But he has all life before him.
” Maria saw what he meant.
“He’s formed to please.
” “And it’s our friend who has formed him.
” Strether felt in it the strange irony.
“So it’s scarcely his fault!
” “It’s at any rate his danger.
I mean,” said Strether, “it’s hers.
But she knows it.
” “Yes, she knows it.
And is your idea,” Miss Gostrey asked, “that there was some other woman in London?
” “Yes.
No. That is I _have_ no ideas.
I’m afraid of them.
I’ve done with them.
” And he put out his hand to her.
“Good-bye.
” It brought her back to her unanswered question.
“To what do you go home?
” “I don’t know.
There will always be something.
” “To a great difference,” she said as she kept his hand.
“A great difference—no doubt.
Yet I shall see what I can make of it.
” “Shall you make anything so good—?
” But, as if remembering what Mrs. Newsome had done, it was as far as she went.
He had sufficiently understood.
“So good as this place at this moment?
So good as what _you_ make of everything you touch?
” He took a moment to say, for, really and truly, what stood about him there in her offer—which was as the offer of exquisite service, of lightened care, for the rest of his days—might well have tempted.
It built him softly round, it roofed him warmly over, it rested, all so firm, on selection.
And what ruled selection was beauty and knowledge.
It was awkward, it was almost stupid, not to seem to prize such things; yet, none the less, so far as they made his opportunity they made it only for a moment.
She’d moreover understand—she always understood.
That indeed might be, but meanwhile she was going on.
“There’s nothing, you know, I wouldn’t do for you.
” “Oh yes—I know.
” “There’s nothing,” she repeated, “in all the world.
” “I know.
I know.
But all the same I must go.
” He had got it at last.
“To be right.
” “To be right?
” She had echoed it in vague deprecation, but he felt it already clear for her.
“That, you see, is my only logic.
Not, out of the whole affair, to have got anything for myself.
” She thought.
“But with your wonderful impressions you’ll have got a great deal.
” “A great deal”—he agreed.
“But nothing like _you_.
It’s you who would make me wrong!
” Honest and fine, she couldn’t greatly pretend she didn’t see it.
Still she could pretend just a little.
“But why should you be so dreadfully right?
” “That’s the way that—if I must go—you yourself would be the first to want me.
And I can’t do anything else.
” So then she had to take it, though still with her defeated protest.
“It isn’t so much your _being_ ‘right’—it’s your horrible sharp eye for what makes you so.
” “Oh but you’re just as bad yourself.
You can’t resist me when I point that out.
” She sighed it at last all comically, all tragically, away.
“I can’t indeed resist you.
” “Then there we are!
” said Strether.
*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE AMBASSADORS ***
Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will be renamed.
Creating the works from print editions not protected by U. S.
copyright law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation (and you!
) can copy and distribute it in the United States without permission and without paying copyright royalties.
Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ concept and trademark.
Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use of the Project Gutenberg trademark.
If you do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the trademark license is very easy.
You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and research.
Project Gutenberg eBooks may be modified and printed and given away—you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks not protected by U. S.
copyright law.
Redistribution is subject to the trademark license, especially commercial redistribution.
START: FULL LICENSE
THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG™ LICENSE
PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
To protect the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting the free distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work (or any other work associated in any way with the phrase “Project Gutenberg”), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project Gutenberg License available with this file or online at www.
gutenberg.
org/license.
Section 1.
General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg electronic works 1. A.
By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property (trademark/copyright) agreement.
If you do not agree to abide by all the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg electronic works in your possession.
If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project Gutenberg electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1. E.
8. 1. B.
“Project Gutenberg” is a registered trademark.
It may only be used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement.
There are a few things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg electronic works even without complying with the full terms of this agreement.
See paragraph 1. C below.
There are a lot of things you can do with Project Gutenberg electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg electronic works.
See paragraph 1. E below.
1. C.
The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation (“the Foundation” or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project Gutenberg electronic works.
Nearly all the individual works in the collection are in the public domain in the United States.
If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the United States and you are located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg are removed.
Of course, we hope that you will support the Project Gutenberg mission of promoting free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg name associated with the work.
You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg License when you share it without charge with others.
1. D.
The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern what you can do with this work.
Copyright laws in most countries are in a constant state of change.
If you are outside the United States, check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project Gutenberg work.
The Foundation makes no representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any country other than the United States.
1. E.
Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: 1. E.
1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg License must appear prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg work (any work on which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” appears, or with which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, copied or distributed: This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever.
You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg™ License included with this eBook or online at www.
gutenberg.
org.
If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook.
1. E.
2. If an individual Project Gutenberg electronic work is derived from texts not protected by U. S.
copyright law (does not contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees or charges.
If you are redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase “Project Gutenberg” associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1. E.
1 through 1. E.
7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1. E.
8 or 1. E.
9. 1. E.
3. If an individual Project Gutenberg electronic work is posted with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution must comply with both paragraphs 1. E.
1 through 1. E.
7 and any additional terms imposed by the copyright holder.
Additional terms will be linked to the Project Gutenberg License for all works posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work.
1. E.
4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg.
1. E.
5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1. E.
1 with active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project Gutenberg License.
1. E.
6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any word processing or hypertext form.
However, if you provide access to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg work in a format other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other format used in the official version posted on the official Project Gutenberg website (www.
gutenberg.
org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other form.
Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg License as specified in paragraph 1. E.
1. 1. E.
7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg works unless you comply with paragraph 1. E.
8 or 1. E.
9. 1. E.
8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing access to or distributing Project Gutenberg electronic works provided that: • You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from the use of Project Gutenberg works calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes.
The fee is owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg trademark, but he has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.
Royalty payments must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns.
Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in Section 4, “Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.
” • You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg™ License.
You must require such a user to return or destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg™ works.
• You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1. F.
3, a full refund of any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of receipt of the work.
• You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works.
1. E.
9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the manager of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark.
Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.
1. F.
1. F.
1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread works not protected by U. S.
copyright law in creating the Project Gutenberg™ collection.
Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg™ electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain “Defects,” such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by your equipment.
1. F.
2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the “Right of Replacement or Refund” described in paragraph 1. F.
3, the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, and any other party distributing a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees.
YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.
F.
3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGE.
1. F.
3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a written explanation to the person you received the work from.
If you received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with your written explanation.
The person or entity that provided you with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a refund.
If you received the work electronically, the person or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund.
If the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further opportunities to fix the problem.
1. F.
4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth in paragraph 1. F.
3, this work is provided to you ‘AS-IS’, WITH NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
1. F.
