Penguin Island — 25 Bk3 Ch4 - Letters: Johannes Talpa

IV. LETTERS: JOHANNES TALPA

During the minority of King Gun, Johannes Talpa, in the monastery of Beargarden, where at the age of fourteen he had made his profession and from which he never departed for a single day throughout his life, composed his celebrated Latin chronicle in twelve books called “De Gestis Penguinorum.”

The monastery of Beargarden lifts its high walls on the summit of an inaccessible peak.

One sees around it only the blue tops of mountains, divided by the clouds.

When he began to write his “Gesta Penguinorum,” Johannes Talpa was already old.

The good monk has taken care to tell us this in his book: “My head has long since lost,” he says, “its adornment of fair hair, and my scalp resembles those convex mirrors of metal which the Penguin ladies consult with so much care and zeal.

My stature, naturally small, has with years become diminished and bent.

My white beard gives warmth to my breast.”

With a charming simplicity, Talpa informs us of certain circumstances in his life and some features in his character.

“Descended,” he tells us, “from a noble family, and destined from childhood for the ecclesiastical state, I was taught grammar and music.

I learnt to read under the guidance of a master who was called Amicus, and who would have been better named Inimicus.

As I did not easily attain to a knowledge of my letters, he beat me violently with rods so that I can say that he printed the alphabet in strokes upon my back.”

In another passage Talpa confesses his natural inclination towards pleasure.

These are his expressive words: “In my youth the ardour of my senses was such that in the shadow of the woods I experienced a sensation of boiling in a pot rather than of breathing the fresh air.

I fled from women, but in vain, for every object recalled them to me.”

While he was writing his chronicle, a terrible war, at once foreign and domestic, laid waste the Penguin land.

The soldiers of Crucha came to defend the monastery of Beargarden against the Penguin barbarians and established themselves strongly within its walls.

In order to render it impregnable they pierced loop-holes through the walls and they took the lead off the church roof to make balls for their slings.

At night they lighted huge fires in the courts and cloisters and on them they roasted whole oxen which they spitted upon the ancient pine-trees of the mountain.

Sitting around the flames, amid smoke filled with a mingled odour of resin and fat, they broached huge casks of wine and beer.

Their songs, their blasphemies, and the noise of their quarrels drowned the sound of the morning bells.

At last the Porpoises, having crossed the defiles, laid siege to the monastery.

They were warriors from the North, clad in copper armour.

They fastened ladders a hundred and fifty fathoms long to the sides of the cliffs and sometimes in the darkness and storm these broke beneath the weight of men and arms, and bunches of the besiegers were hurled into the ravines and precipices.

A prolonged wail would be heard going down into the darkness, and the assault would begin again.

The Penguins poured streams of burning wax upon their assailants, which made them blaze like torches.

Sixty times the enraged Porpoises attempted to scale the monastery and sixty times they were repulsed.

For six months they had closely invested the monastery, when, on the day of the Epiphany, a shepherd of the valley showed them a hidden path by which they climbed the mountain, penetrated into the vaults of the abbey, ran through the cloisters, the kitchens, the church, the chapter halls, the library, the laundry, the cells, the refectories, and the dormitories, and burned the buildings, killing and violating without distinction of age or sex.

The Penguins, awakened unexpectedly, ran to arms, but in the darkness and alarm they struck at one another, whilst the Porpoises with blows of their axes disputed the sacred vessels, the censers, the candlesticks, dalmatics, reliquaries, golden crosses, and precious stones.

The air was filled with an acrid odour of burnt flesh.

Groans and death-cries arose in the midst of the flames, and on the edges of the crumbling roofs monks ran in thousands like ants, and fell into the valley.

Yet Johannes Talpa kept on writing his Chronicle.

The soldiers of Crucha retreated speedily and filled up all the issues from the monastery with pieces of rock so as to shut up the Porpoises in the burning buildings.

And to crush the enemy beneath the ruin they employed the trunks of old oaks as battering-rams.

The burning timbers fell in with a noise like thunder and the lofty arches of the naves crumbled beneath the shock of these giant trees when moved by six hundred men together.

Soon there was left nothing of the rich and extensive abbey but the cell of Johannes Talpa, which, by a marvellous chance, hung from the ruin of a smoking gable.

The old chronicler still kept writing.

This admirable intensity of thought may seem excessive in the case of an annalist who applies himself to relate the events of his own time.

However abstracted and detached we may be from surrounding things, we nevertheless resent their influence.

I have consulted the original manuscript of Johannes Talpa in the National Library, where it is preserved (_Monumenta Peng_., _K_.

_L_6., 12390 _four_).

It is a parchment manuscript of 628 leaves.

The writing is extremely confused, the letters instead of being in a straight line, stray in all directions and are mingled together in great disorder, or, more correctly speaking, in absolute confusion.

They are so badly formed that for the most part it is impossible not merely to say what they are, but even to distinguish them from the splashes of ink with which they are plentifully interspersed.

Those inestimable pages bear witness in this way to the troubles amid which they were written.

To read them is difficult.

On the other hand, the monk of Beargarden’s style shows no trace of emotion.

The tone of the “Gesta Penguinorum” never departs from simplicity.

The narration is rapid and of a conciseness that sometimes approaches dryness.

The reflections are rare and, as a rule, judicious.