Penguin Island — 46 Bk6 Ch8 - The Columban Trial
VIII. THE COLOMBAN TRIAL
When the Colomban trial began, the Pyrotists were not many more than
thirty thousand, but they were every where and might be found even
among the priests and millionaires.
What injured them most was the
sympathy of the rich Jews.
On the other hand they derived valuable
advantages from their feeble number.
In the first place there were
among them fewer fools than among their opponents, who were
over-burdened with them.
Comprising but a feeble minority, they
co-operated easily, acted with harmony, and had no temptation to divide
and thus counteract one another’s efforts.
Each of them felt the
necessity of doing the best possible and was the more careful of his
conduct as he found himself more in the public eye.
Finally, they had
every reason to hope that they would gain fresh adherents, while their
opponents, having had everybody with them at the beginning, could only
decrease.
Summoned before the judges at a public sitting, Colomban immediately
perceived that his judges were not anxious to discover the truth.
As
soon as he opened his mouth the President ordered him to be silent in
the superior interests of the State.
For the same reason, which is the
supreme reason, the witnesses for the defence were not heard.
General
Panther, the Chief of the Staff, appeared in the witness-box, in full
uniform and decorated with all his orders.
He deposed as follows: “The infamous Colomban states that we have no proofs against Pyrot.
He
lies; we have them.
I have in my archives seven hundred and thirty-two
square yards of them which at five hundred pounds each make three
hundred and sixty-six thousand pounds.”
That superior officer afterwards gave, with elegance and ease, a
summary of those proofs.
“They are of all colours and all shades,” said he in substance, “they
are of every form—pot, crown, sovereign, grape, dove-cot, grand eagle,
etc. The smallest is less than the hundredth part of a square inch, the
largest measures seventy yards long by ninety yards broad.”
At this revelation the audience shuddered with horror.
Greatauk came to give evidence in his turn.
Simpler, and perhaps
greater, he wore a grey tunic and held his hands joined behind his
back.
“I leave,” said he calmly and in a slightly raised voice, “I leave to
M. Colomban the responsibility for an act that has brought our country
to the brink of ruin.
The Pyrot affair is secret; it ought to remain
secret.
If it were divulged the cruelest ills, wars, pillages,
depredations, fires, massacres, and epidemics would immediately burst
upon Penguinia.
I should consider myself guilty of high treason if I
uttered another word.”
Some persons known for their political experience, among others M. Bigourd, considered the evidence of the Minister of War as abler and of
greater weight than that of his Chief of Staff.
The evidence of Colonel de Boisjoli made a great impression.
“One evening at the Ministry of War,” said that officer, “the attaché
of a neighbouring Power told me that while visiting his sovereign’s
stables he had once admired some soft and fragrant hay, of a pretty
green colour, the finest hay he had ever seen!
‘Where did it come
from?’ I asked him.
He did not answer, but there seemed to me no doubt
about its origin.
It was the hay Pyrot had stolen.
Those qualities of
verdure, softness, and aroma, are those of our national hay.
The forage
of the neighbouring Power is grey and brittle; it sounds under the fork
and smells of dust.
One can draw one own conclusions.”
Lieutenant-Colonel Hastaing said in the witness-box, amid hisses, that
he did not believe Pyrot guilty.
He was immediately seized by the
police and thrown into the bottom of a dungeon where, amid vipers,
toads, and broken glass, he remained insensible both to promises and
threats.
The usher called: “Count Pierre Maubec de la Dentdulynx.”
There was deep silence, and a stately but ill-dressed nobleman, whose
moustaches pointed to the skies and whose dark eyes shot forth flashing
glances, was seen advancing toward the witness-box.
He approached Colomban and casting upon him a look of ineffable
disdain: “My evidence,” said he, “here it is: you excrement!”
At these words the entire hall burst into enthusiastic applause and
jumped up, moved by one of those transports that stir men’s hearts and
rouse them to extraordinary actions.
Without another word Count Maubec
de la Dentdulynx withdrew.
All those present left the Court and formed a procession behind him.
Prostrate at his feet, Princess des Boscénos held his legs in a close
embrace, but he went on, stern and impassive, beneath a shower of
handkerchiefs and flowers.
Viscountess Olive, clinging to his neck,
could not be removed, and the calm hero bore her along with him,
floating on his breast like a light scarf.
When the court resumed its sitting, which it had been compelled to
suspend, the President called the experts.
Vermillard, the famous expert in handwriting, gave the results of his
researches.
“Having carefully studied,” said he, “the papers found in Pyrot’s
house, in particular his account book and his laundry books, I noticed
that, though apparently not out of the common, they formed an
impenetrable cryptogram, the key to which, however, I discovered.
The
traitor’s infamy is to be seen in every line.
In this system of writing
the words ‘Three glasses of beer and twenty francs for Adèle’ mean ‘I
have delivered thirty thousand trusses of hay to a neighbouring Power.’
From these documents I have even been able to establish the composition
of the hay delivered by this officer.
The words waistcoat, drawers,
pocket handkerchief, collars, drink, tobacco, cigars, mean clover,
meadowgrass, lucern, burnet, oats, rye-grass, vernal-grass, and common
cat’s tail grass.
And these are precisely the constituents of the hay
furnished by Count Maubec to the Penguin cavalry.
In this way Pyrot
mentioned his crimes in a language that he believed would always remain
indecipherable.
One is confounded by so much astuteness and so great a
want of conscience.”
Colomban, pronounced guilty without any extenuating circumstances, was
condemned to the severest penalty.
The judges immediately signed a
warrant consuming him to solitary confinement.
In the Place du Palais on the sides of a river whose banks had during
the course of twelve centuries seen so great a history, fifty thousand
persons were tumultuously awaiting the result of the trial.
Here were
the heads of the Anti-Pyrotist Association, among whom might be seen
Prince des Boscénos, Count Cléna, Viscount Olive, and M. de La
Trumelle; here crowded the Reverend Father Agaric and the teachers of
St. Maël College with their pupils; here the monk Douillard and General
Caraguel, embracing each other, formed a sublime group.
The market
women and laundry women with spits, shovels, tongs, beetles, and
kettles full of water might be seen running across the Pont-Vieux.
On
the steps in front of the bronze gates were assembled all the defenders
of Pyrot in Alca, professors, publicists, workmen, some conservatives,
others Radicals or Revolutionaries, and by their negligent dress and
fierce aspect could be recognised comrades Phœnix, Larrivée,
Lapersonne, Dagobert, and Varambille.
Squeezed in his funereal
frock-coat and wearing his hat of ceremony, Bidault-Coquille invoked
the sentimental mathematics on behalf of Colomban and Colonel Hastaing.
Maniflore shone smiling and resplendent on the topmost step, anxious,
like Leaena, to deserve a glorious monument, or to be given, like
Epicharis, the praises of history.
The seven hundred Pyrotists disguised as lemonade sellers,
gutter-merchants, collectors of odds and ends, or anti-Pyrotists,
wandered round the vast building.
When Colomban appeared, so great an uproar burst forth that, struck by
the commotion of air and water, birds fell from the trees and fishes
floated on the surface of the stream.
On all sides there were yells: “Duck Colomban, duck him, duck him!”
There were some cries of “Justice and truth!” and a voice was even
heard shouting: “Down with the Army!”
This was the signal for a terrible struggle.
The combatants fell in
thousands, and their bodies formed howling and moving mounds on top of
which fresh champions gripped each other by the throats.
Women, eager,
pale, and dishevelled, with clenched teeth and frantic nails, rushed on
the man, in transports that, in the brilliant light of the public
square, gave to their faces expressions unsurpassed even in the shade
of curtains and in the hollows of pillows.
They were going to seize
Colomban, to bite him, to strangle, dismember and rend him, when
Maniflore, tall and dignified in her red tunic, stood forth, serene and
terrible, confronting these furies who recoiled from before her in
terror.
Colomban seemed to be saved; his partisans succeeded in
clearing a passage for him through the Place du Palais and in putting
him into a cab stationed at the corner of the Pont-Vieux.
The horse was
already in full trot when Prince des Boscénos, Count Cléna, and M. de
La Trumelle knocked the driver off his seat.
Then, making the animal
back and pushing the spokes of the wheels, they ran the vehicle on to
the parapet of the bridge, whence they overturned it into the river
amid the cheers of the delirious crowd.
With a resounding splash a jet
of water rose upwards, and then nothing but a slight eddy was to be
seen on the surface of the stream.
Almost immediately comrades Dagobert and Varambille, with the help of
the seven hundred disguised Pyrotists, sent Prince des Boscénos head
foremost into a river-laundry in which he was lamentably swallowed up.
Serene night descended over the Place du Palais and shed silence and
peace upon the frightful ruins with which it was strewed.
In the mean
time, Colomban, three thousand yards down the stream, cowering beside a
lame old horse on a bridge, was meditating on the ignorance and
injustice of crowds.
“The business,” said he to himself, “is even more troublesome than I
believed.
I foresee fresh difficulties.”
He got up and approached the unhappy animal.
“What have you, poor friend, done to them?” said he.
“It is on my
account they have used you so cruelly.”
He embraced the unfortunate beast and kissed the white star on his
forehead.
Then he took him by the bridle and led him, both of them
limping, trough the sleeping city to his house, where sleep soon
allowed them to forget mankind.